“Go to Your Inner Room”

It feels strange to be celebrating Ash Wednesday alone, with no one in church. It would feel even stranger except that we have done this before – last spring when public Masses were suspended. This time it is not the virus that prevents us from gathering but the dangerously cold and inclement weather. I hope everyone is staying warm and safe.

My first Ash Wednesday as a priest was in 2013. It was just two days after Pope Benedict XVI announced that he was going to resign the papacy. Maybe you remember how shocking that idea was at the time, perhaps still is. He came to the conclusion that the responsibilities of the papacy had become too great for his abilities, and so he believed he would best serve God by stepping away, to spend the remainder of his life in prayer and reflection. His decision taught me something about the importance of humility as a priest – to not overestimate your own gifts and abilities. In the years since, I’ve learned more about why prayer and reflection are not just integral to the Christian life but the most important thing.

In the Gospel today, Jesus tells us that our prayer should be done “in secret,” in our “inner room,” with only our Father able to see us. While our culture seems to demand that we must always be active, always *doing* something, Jesus tells us we are obliged to slow down, be alone, and pray to God. Last spring, when we were all forced to stay at home, and could only participate in Mass by watching it online, we embraced the idea of spending more time in prayer, with God, communicating to him about what is most important. I wonder at times if we have unlearned those lessons in just a few short months, as it seems the pandemic in many ways has only added to the bustle and busyness that fills our lives.

Henri de Braekeleer, The Man in the Chair (1875)

Perhaps it is good, therefore, to begin Lent in this way. I know we would like to receive ashes; it feels strange to not begin Lent as we are used to doing. But just because we are not in church doesn’t mean we can’t enter into the spirit of the season; just because we won’t receive ashes this year doesn’t mean we can’t embrace penitence. By our prayer and reflection, by our fasting and abstinence, we can direct our minds and hearts to our heavenly Father. 

What is on your heart this Lent? What are you ready for God to do? What are you ready to do for God, with God? Think about it, and then talk about it with God. Perhaps the Lord is giving us an excellent opportunity today to shut the computer, turn off the TV, put away the phone, and go into our inner room and spend time in conversation with him. Right from home, in our inner room, let’s learn again our need for penance, for humility, for total reliance on our heavenly Father.

“And your Father who sees in secret will repay you.”